Soliloquy of a Juneberry

Amazing Grace

Touching...

Lifted from The Straits Times, Mind Your Body, Words by the Editor -Sharon Loh

" Faced with the inevitable pillaging of a terrifying disease, Ray and Grace Smith decided that they would make the most of the time they had left together.

What do you want to do, Ray asked his wife, Grace, shortly after she was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease, whoch would eventually rob her of her mind, faculties and self-awareness. Travel, she replied, and that is what they did, on a shoestring budget, so they could more of the world.

I don't know if faced with the prospect of of a slow death, I would be able to focus on much else beyond the treatments available for the disease i might have. But the Smiths were retired nurses and perhaps they also needed to cherish what was left of life.

In an interview with Mind Your Body, Ray brimmed over with happy memories of those years with hhis ailing wife even though it must also have been amost painful time.

Illness, especially a long-drawn-out and debilitating one, is exhausting on a relationship. It can supplant eveything that was there before. And as you lose, bit by bit, the person you once knew and loved, bewilderment, resentment and guilt could poison your affection.

It takes true compassion not to resent one's partner for being ill and to understand that his or her needs are greater than one's own.

But not all of us can be that strong. When it comes to caring for the chronic sick, a support network, either of family or community services is vital.

And aside from the occasional respite, a sense of humour and the determination to see good in everything wouldn't hurt either. "

posted by juneberry @ Wednesday, April 05, 2006